The Lost Loki For America Pitch

The pitch that led to a goat in a superbowl

Tom here!

So I’m with my family, and we’re watching the Superbowl along with a 100 million other people, and there’s a commercial with a bunch of goats in it that we and 100 million other people are watching, and one of the goats is a Loki Goat, and he’s wearing a “Vote Loki” presidential button thing, and I say, “Hey, I did that! Kind of!” and my kids think I’m crazy because I’m yelling about a goat.

But (twist!) I’m not (entirely!) crazy (yet).

See, it’s simple. Well…This Loki Goat is a take on a part of the Loki TV show, which was inspired by an awesome comic book about Loki running for president, which started as a pitch I did for Marvel, which I didn’t end up writing because I left to write Batman at DC. So, y’know, Super Bowl wise, I’m basically Tom Brady, except that he’s The Goat and I did a thing that, eventually, led to a goat—but like almost the same.

I mean, how can I be crazy? My name is even in the credits of the TV series (at the very, very end. Of one episode. Next to a lot of other people who did a lot more than I did. But still.)

To commemorate the occasion of this goat appearance, I thought it would fun to post for the first time my full pitch from 2015 that started this strange series of events. I still love the idea and would’ve loved to have written it…but Batman… sigh, but, always, forever Batman.

Let me know what you think in the comments. And thanks for reading and thanks for maybe thinking of me the next time you see a goat dressed as a guy dressed as a comic character based somewhat on a pitch I wrote.

THE PITCH:

Loki For America

Pitch By Tom King

Game of Thrones meets House of Cards as the God of Lies runs for President of the United States.

2016. Election night. The vote is tied. Both candidates wait for Ohio. At Liberty National Party headquarters in Oklahoma, the crowd grows restless. The nominee comes out of the green room to say a few words, knowing he may soon run the free world. Loki makes his way to the stage.

At the curtain, his brother who was Thor stops him, whispers something in Loki’s ear. Loki looks upset. He walks to the podium, stands in front of the adoring crowd, many of them holding signs carrying his election slogan: “LOKI FOR AMERICA!” Loki looks down. He whispers. “I am not worthy.”

BANG

Loki is assassinated at the podium. His blood fills the stage.

We flashback two years. The War of the Realms has caused a refugee crisis on Midgard. Millions of elves flee their homes and come to America, disrupting every day life. The people call for their removal. But nothing can be done; the elves have no where else to go. The people grow restless, desperate.

And Loki appears. “I am one of them,” he says. “I know how this scum lives; I know how this scum can take over a country, your country, our country. And I have a plan to rid you of these outsiders. Your leaders can’t save you. The Avengers can’t save you. Thor can’t save you.” The God of Lies smiles. “But I can save you. If you give me the power, I can save all of you.”

Loki opens his arms. “America, My name is Loki. I am an immigrant. I am a God. I am you. I am better than you. And I am running for president of the United States of America!”

People love him. He’s an outsider. He can’t be bought. Because he is the master of lies, he knows how to expose them. He promises them utopia in return for legitimacy, and America eagerly accept his offer. To the frustration of every hero, Loki rises in the polls, coming closer and closer to the presidency.

And all the while, someone waits with the bullet.

Loki For America is the story of a man who always loses finally finding a way to win. Loki understands that he can never beat Thor directly. But perhaps he can beat Thor indirectly. By earning the support of Thor’s chosen people, Loki creates a shield around his actions that even the hammer can’t penetrate. “Attack me, and you are attacking America; work for me, and you are working for America.”

This is not a political satire or a banal commentary on today’s events. This is Hitler. This is Mussolini. This is the man who trades salvation for power. This is a tale of evil, how evil actually works, an evil our audience can understand, an evil they see every day, an evil that will actually frustrate them, scare them, and ultimately thrill them. Loki must fight off the demons of his past and the heroes of his present to take the throne of our country, and in that fight he will show the true power of lies, a power unlike any other in the Marvel Universe.

Loki is charming. Loki is entertaining. Loki is a liar. Or, put another way, Loki is just a natural politician.